
Pinpointing Hidden Stress
Most of the time, we are aware of what's stressing us out at any given moment. It's getting a flat tire on the way to work, being stood up on a date, a late fee on a bill you forgot to pay, a wailing baby, or that cashier who won't stop talking to the customer in front of us.
At other times, it can be something more physical, such as itchy, watery eyes from an allergy, a tag on clothing that keeps scratching our neck, or a nagging ache somewhere. However, sometimes what's causing us stress isn't immediately apparent. We don't recognize it because we've become used to it. Stress can remain hidden in any of the following areas of your life.
- Your Physical Body
- Home Environment
- Spirit & Small Joys
- Relationships, Affection & Social Activities
- Daily Personal Activities
- Learning & Creative Endeavors
- Finances
The following exercise will help you pinpoint hidden stressors in these areas of your life. You are welcome to skip any section you like, but only after completing the first section, "MY PHYSICAL BODY". Your body is where you live, and because over 50% of all stress is physically related, it's essential to begin there. There are no right or wrong answers. Feel free to download the printable workbook at the bottom of this page.
Be sure to note any changes you would like to make in any area of your life, along with the reasons behind them. Understanding why is so important because it's your "Why?" that will continue to motivate you when you feel like giving up. Pace yourself. Making too many changes all at once can cause overwhelm and loss of motivation.
You'll find supportive links throughout this site to help answer questions and make lifestyle changes.
My Physical Body
My Nutrition
How healthy is my diet? What do I eat most (grains, vegetables, fruit, milk or dairy, fats, meats)?
What foods or beverages do I partake of that I know or suspect might harm my body (processed food, fast food, sugar, salt, caffeine, alcohol, and sodas)?
Food sensitivities can cause fatigue, irritability, sadness, and hypersensitivity. The foods you are most sensitive to are the ones you are likely to crave. Eating whole foods daily, such as fruits, vegetables (including seaweed and other sea vegetables), healthy grains, nuts, seeds, organic dairy products, poultry, and fish, is crucial for maintaining good health and overall well-being.
Is My Weight Appropriate for My Frame?
- What do I weigh?
- How many pounds, if any, would I like to lose or gain?
- What is a healthy goal weight for me?
- What is my Body Mass Index?
- How many calories should I consume daily to maintain a healthy weight?
How to Calculate Your Body Mass Index
First things first, let's determine your body mass index. Your body mass index (BMI) measures your weight in relation to your height, assessing your risk of weight-related health problems. A BMI between 25 and 29.9 is considered approximately 20% overweight with moderate health risks, but not obese. However, if you're female with a waist measurement over 35" (or a male with a waist measurement over 40"), a BMI between 25 and 34.9 is considered high risk. A BMI of 30 or higher is considered obese, and additional health problems may arise, such as heart disease, diabetes, or high blood pressure.
You don't have to look overweight to be obese. How's that, you ask? You can have far too much fat on your frame for your height and bone size. Normal-weight obesity is a growing concern among Americans, a condition characterized by having excessive fat compared to muscle. Your body mass index won't mean much if you're small but overfat. However, you still risk heart disease, diabetes, and other obesity-related diseases.
- Multiply your weight (in pounds) times 703.
- Multiply your height (in inches) times itself.
- Take the number you got in Step 1 and divide it by the number you got in Step 2. The result is your BMI.
You'll find formulas for answering these questions inside Weight Management.
What Supplements Do I Take, and Why?
What are the combined total dosages of all the supplements I take?
Adding up all those milligrams and units is tedious, but extremely important to know. You may need to take less or more. So, grab your supplement jars and add up all your daily dosages. Please peek at any added ingredients to ensure you are not sensitive to them.
To learn which daily vitamins and dosages are essential (and the foods that contain them), refer to Vitamins & Supplements.
My Sleeping Pattern
- How well do I sleep? Very Well ___ No Complaints ___ OK ___ Not Well ___ Poorly ___
- What hours do I usually sleep?
Do I often wake up, have difficulty falling or returning to sleep, go to bed late, or experience insomnia or racing thoughts? Are there any other sleep disturbances bothering me, such as a snoring partner, ringing in my ears, noisy neighbors, a nearby plane or train, or a barking dog?
Not getting quality sleep regularly can cause stress syndromes, such as mood disorders, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Fibromyalgia Syndrome, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, and more frequent herpes outbreaks. You'll find holistic alternatives for these conditions here.
Health & Wellness Concerns
- What about my state of emotional or physical health concerns me?
- What symptoms, conditions, illnesses, or diseases do I fear having?
- How often do I get gas, acid reflux, indigestion, pain, constipation, or diarrhea?
- Where does my body ache or feel pain the most?
- What prescription or over-the-counter medications am I taking or supposed to take, and why? Do I need to follow up with my doctor to make any changes to my medication?
It might be a good idea to schedule a physical exam if you last had one a while ago. Write down your concerns, worries, and complaints beforehand to ensure you don't forget to mention them when you arrive at the doctor's office.
Procrastinating a visit or refusing to take medication can cause additional stress. If you experience any adverse side effects from your medication, please notify your doctor immediately. Don't just stop taking prescription medication on your own. Some medicines can be quite dangerous if you quit cold turkey.
Also, speak with your doctor about any natural remedies you're considering. Just because something is natural doesn't mean it can't interfere with medications or cause side effects. If your doctor has no training in natural alternatives, request a referral to a naturopath. You'll want to see someone who specializes in the natural treatment you seek. For example, some naturopaths specialize in diet and supplements, while others focus on homeopathic medicines. Another suggestion might be to see an allopathic doctor certified in functional medicine.
Exercise
- What types of exercise do I engage in regularly? How often? For how long?
- What do I like or dislike about exercising?
- What keeps me from exercising?
My Home Environment
- What do I like about my home or office environment?
- What don't I like? What makes me uncomfortable in my environment?
- Is there anything I would like to change? What, where, and why?
- Livingroom _____
- Dining Room Kitchen _____
- Hallway/Entryway _____
- Bathroom _____
- Bedroom _____
- A Child's Room _____
- Home Office _____
You may find that your home or office becomes messy or cluttered when you're stressed. Staying organized or even caring about being organized when stressed is challenging. However, getting things cleaned up and organized can help you move forward, stimulate blood flow (which is emotionally energizing), and offer a wonderful sense of accomplishment. See Creating Healthy Spaces for tips on energizing your spaces.
My Spirit & Small Joys
Am I living my beliefs in my daily life? Does my life reflect who I am, or am I trying to live up to what others expect of me? If so, why? What is the benefit? What is the price?
How often do I leave the house each week to do enjoyable things (library, movies, gardening, fun shopping)?
Sometimes, we feel spiritually stressed and experience less joy when we don't use our senses enough. We experience aliveness, connection, and joy through our senses of sight, sound, smell, taste, touch, and spirit. It may be time to engage your senses for optimal energy balance. Think of one thing you have been putting off doing that you would enjoy. Just do it.
Discover sense-based activities just for you!
My Relationships, Affection & Social Activities
My Doses of Affection
- How often do I show affection to others (holding hands, giving hugs, expressing love)?
- Am I content with the amount of affection I give or receive? Do I need more or less affection in my life? What are my feelings about this?
- Am I able to be intimate with anyone in my life? Intimacy means closeness.
- Am I happy with my sexual life or decision to remain celibate? Why or why not?
You can be intimate with anyone, as intimacy does not imply anything sexual. It is a natural emotional component of a healthy relationship. Intimacy is simply being close and having an understanding or a deep bond with your best friend, parents, children, and even a pet. Sexuality, on the other hand, involves romanticism, love, passion, and lust in physical expression, which is also healthy under the right circumstances.
If you have ever been a victim of sexual abuse, there's RAINN (see Resources) for anyone who has been a victim of sexual abuse at any time, whether male or female.
My Relationships
- Am I satisfied with the relationships in my life? If not, why not?
On a piece of paper, list the relationships you are happy with and write down why they make you happy. This list will help you remember those who care about you, admire you, and whom you can turn to for emotional support. Now, do the same for the relationships that make you unhappy. Write down how they make you feel, why they make you miserable, what your responsibility for this unhappiness is (if at all), and what, if anything, you can do to make things better. If it's out of your hands, be sure to note that as well.
Sometimes, others can make you feel like you are somehow "less" when they don't understand you. And, sometimes, it's your thoughts and feelings about misunderstandings that can bring you down. Low self-esteem, yours or theirs, can negatively affect and sabotage an otherwise healthy relationship. Sadness and oppression can feel like depression when it isn't.
Broken relationships that never mend can cause considerable ongoing stress, negatively impacting your immune system. If you can't improve things, write down your feelings and options for leaving your dysfunctional or abusive relationship. Seek help in any way available to you, such as through your family, friends, church, or organizations, or ask your doctor for a referral to counseling.
Close, personal relationships must encompass unconditional love, the capacity for emotional intimacy, and the ability to share simple pleasures.
Social Activities
- How often do I accept or extend invitations to get together with friends, family, or coworkers?
- What kinds of things do I like to do, or would I want to do with others?
When you're overwhelmed, the last thing you want to do is extend or accept an invitation. I get it. But guess what? Unless you are sick or completely exhausted, socializing is one of the best things you can do to re-energize, regain your perspective, and feel good about yourself. Since the pandemic hit, socializing has been on the back burner for many people, especially seniors. Even if you have to visit through a glass window, do it. Humans suffer when there's a lack of contact and communication. Take advantage of technology that allows you to keep in touch. At the very least, call (don't text) friends and loved ones.
My Daily Personal Activities
My Technological Activities
- How much time do I spend sitting in front of a screen (TV, phone, computer, etc.) or absorbing EMFs (electromagnetic frequencies) daily? Which of these activities do I involve myself in the most?
- What am I achieving or accomplishing by doing so (in terms of work, socializing, education, or entertainment)?
- Is any of this time spent unproductively? _____ How so? ________________
- How much unproductive time do you spend each day? ________________________
- How might I better balance my time and energy around these activities? Am I procrastinating?
Be mindful of what you watch on the computer, television, and movies. While stimulating dramas, argumentative reality shows, horror flicks, and breaking news may be entertaining, they are draining and life-shortening. Anything that disturbs or feeds your eyes and ears negativity causes a host of adverse chemical reactions in your body. Instead, opt for sense-based activities that engage your senses of sight, sound, touch, taste, and hearing, and make you feel good about life. Again, see sense-based activities just for you.
My Common Daily Personal Activities
- I spend most of my waking hours __________.
- I wish I had more time to __________.
Just thinking about a thing and never taking action wastes enormous energy and is self-defeating. Continuously avoiding the things that could bring you joy and satisfaction will lower your opinion about yourself and your self-esteem. Do the things that you keep wishing you had more time to do. Do them now before there is no more opportunity to do them.
My Learning & Creative Endeavors
- Over the past few weeks or months, I learned how to __________.
- I have always wanted to learn how to __________.
- I'm good at, used to be good at, or would like to be good at __________.
Scientists have proven that the brain's cells renew when your mind actively engages in new learning. Consider engaging in hobbies such as crossword puzzles, reading, board games, learning a new language, or taking a class to enhance your mental capacity for years to come.
My Career & Finances
- Am I working in a job I like?
- What do I like about it?
- What do I not like about it?
- To be able to change __________ in my career __________ as a way to earn money would make me very happy.
- Is there anything I have been procrastinating on that would help me feel happier about my work? What is it, and why?
- If I were rich, what would I do with my money?
- In what shape are my finances?
- What can I do to gain better control over my finances?
Tips to Cut Back on Spending
- Balance your checkbook.
- Create a budget and stick to it (see Setting SMART Goals).
- Stop unnecessary overspending, especially with credit cards.
- If you can afford to, pay half the interest fee on credit cards in addition to your monthly credit card payment.
- Take a sack lunch to work.
- Save an amount of money each month.
- Rent fewer movies or turn off cable television altogether.
- Eat out less.
- Trade babysitting with other parents.
- Bargain and thrift shop
- Discover how to invest your money, explore IRAs, and explore other retirement options.
- Consider earning income from something you're knowledgeable about. Write an e-book, create and sell a product, or offer services.
- For a designated period, spend only on food, shelter, and clothing. If a purchase doesn't meet these criteria, don't spend your money.

The Pinpointing Hidden Stress Printable, Fillable Workbook
Print it out or fill in the blanks on your device any time you need assistance in uncovering hidden stresses.
